A SPECIAL GIFT to Shriner's from vf.com
Moderators: Daniel Jackson, greg
- jedimarley
- Evra'Ting Ire Mon.
- Posts: 16063
- Joined: Mon Jan 17, 2005 1:44:29 pm
- jedimarley
- Evra'Ting Ire Mon.
- Posts: 16063
- Joined: Mon Jan 17, 2005 1:44:29 pm
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- ...it has been down hill ever since.
- Posts: 3988
- Joined: Thu Dec 30, 2004 3:18:44 am
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- ...it has been down hill ever since.
- Posts: 3988
- Joined: Thu Dec 30, 2004 3:18:44 am
I understand it is a touchy subject, and of course it's up to the parents, but I'd like to think all of us on this website are mature enough where we can look at photos of burn victims receiving their gifts and see their smiles and their hearts and not the visual effects the tragedies have had on their bodies.
I would tend to agree but just dont want to press anyones buttons. With all the charity work that Ric does ( he has helped out my Cystic Fibrosis already this year to the tune of over $13,000), I am happy with the knowledge that this board was able to help out a few kids during the holidays.
I am sure Ric will provide what he can with the best interest of all in mind.
I am sure Ric will provide what he can with the best interest of all in mind.
- Byrneout
- ...and in THIS corner...
- Posts: 2706
- Joined: Fri Apr 02, 2004 12:26:40 pm
- Location: Originally Hell's Kitchen, NY - *SKREE* that "Clinton, NY" *SKREE* - now Cincinnati, OH
I agree that we can all be mature enough to view such pictures. However, that is not the issue at hand. From personal experience, who views the picture has no bearing on whether the picture can be taken.
I refused to have pictures taken for the longest time after my stay in Shriner's. The occassional snapshot of me does exist, but from the ages of 7 to 21 I refused to allow pictures to be taken of me if it could be avoided.
Why? Because I thought of myself as a freak, a monster, as a hideously deformed thing, and pictures only reminded me of that. When I first saw myself in a mirror after the incident, I started crying - I was scared by the horrible apparition in front of me... this couldn't be what I looked like staring back at me. I didn't look like that, I looked like me, and that was most certainly not me in the mirror. Someone had to be playing some sort of dirty trick on me.
It's most certainly not easy being a burn victim, and I was one of the LUCKY ones. I retained all of my limbs and basic features, with only scarring to show for it. Even with what now seems to be so little an amount of damage, I was ridiculed and bullied by "normal" children in my neighborhood. The local public elementary forced me to come to school 10 minutes after school began, leave 10 minutes before school let out, and I had to go home for lunch and recess because it was deemed by some witless administrator that my appearance might be "disturbing" to the other children. Those few times that I did meet with the other children en masse, they would gasp, poke, prod, and openly comment about how ugly I was. Both of my arms were in braces that restricted their movement due to the reconstructive surgeries I had undergone, so when the more violent ones decided to "beat the freak" or "rough up Scarface" I couldn't even effectively fight back.
Needless to say, this caused MAJOR negative opinions about my appearance. Most burn victims have difficulties with their self-image for the majority of their lives, and I was no exception.
And remember, I'm one of the LUCKY ones. I didn't lose a nose or lips or ears or hand or foot. As long as I have a van dyke and a long t-shirt, my scars are virtually invisible. Imagine how much harder, how much more deep-rooted these issues are going to be for those who did lose something significant, or whose scarring is much more prominent. Hell, some of these children end up ABANDONED at Shriner's because their parents can't handle looking at their own child.
So, I will do what I do every Christmas. I will go up on the floor, with my camera. I'll politely ask if there's anyone that I can take pictures of - and I will not push the issue. This may mean that I have no pictures of the children whatsoever... but that is absolutely fine with me.
On the other hand, I can understand the board members wanting to see the results of their actions and contributions. You want to see the eyes light up, the eager smiles coming to the faces. Nothing can replace being there and observing it first hand. I can also understand if some people become suspicious of whether the items actually make it to the children or not - and if anyone has a question in that regards, I can provide a reference at the Hospital who would be more than willing to vouch for the final disposition of the donations. Also, I'll make sure that pictures are taken on-site so that everyone will know that the gifts made it to Shriner's.
I hope you understand my position on this. I apologize if I come across as a little harsh - but I tend to get emotional in regards to the subject - after all, I spent time in the Burns Institute, and I wouldn't be alive if it weren't for Shriner's. If you have any issues with this, please feel free to reply, pm, or email me to discuss it further.
I refused to have pictures taken for the longest time after my stay in Shriner's. The occassional snapshot of me does exist, but from the ages of 7 to 21 I refused to allow pictures to be taken of me if it could be avoided.
Why? Because I thought of myself as a freak, a monster, as a hideously deformed thing, and pictures only reminded me of that. When I first saw myself in a mirror after the incident, I started crying - I was scared by the horrible apparition in front of me... this couldn't be what I looked like staring back at me. I didn't look like that, I looked like me, and that was most certainly not me in the mirror. Someone had to be playing some sort of dirty trick on me.
It's most certainly not easy being a burn victim, and I was one of the LUCKY ones. I retained all of my limbs and basic features, with only scarring to show for it. Even with what now seems to be so little an amount of damage, I was ridiculed and bullied by "normal" children in my neighborhood. The local public elementary forced me to come to school 10 minutes after school began, leave 10 minutes before school let out, and I had to go home for lunch and recess because it was deemed by some witless administrator that my appearance might be "disturbing" to the other children. Those few times that I did meet with the other children en masse, they would gasp, poke, prod, and openly comment about how ugly I was. Both of my arms were in braces that restricted their movement due to the reconstructive surgeries I had undergone, so when the more violent ones decided to "beat the freak" or "rough up Scarface" I couldn't even effectively fight back.
Needless to say, this caused MAJOR negative opinions about my appearance. Most burn victims have difficulties with their self-image for the majority of their lives, and I was no exception.
And remember, I'm one of the LUCKY ones. I didn't lose a nose or lips or ears or hand or foot. As long as I have a van dyke and a long t-shirt, my scars are virtually invisible. Imagine how much harder, how much more deep-rooted these issues are going to be for those who did lose something significant, or whose scarring is much more prominent. Hell, some of these children end up ABANDONED at Shriner's because their parents can't handle looking at their own child.
So, I will do what I do every Christmas. I will go up on the floor, with my camera. I'll politely ask if there's anyone that I can take pictures of - and I will not push the issue. This may mean that I have no pictures of the children whatsoever... but that is absolutely fine with me.
On the other hand, I can understand the board members wanting to see the results of their actions and contributions. You want to see the eyes light up, the eager smiles coming to the faces. Nothing can replace being there and observing it first hand. I can also understand if some people become suspicious of whether the items actually make it to the children or not - and if anyone has a question in that regards, I can provide a reference at the Hospital who would be more than willing to vouch for the final disposition of the donations. Also, I'll make sure that pictures are taken on-site so that everyone will know that the gifts made it to Shriner's.
I hope you understand my position on this. I apologize if I come across as a little harsh - but I tend to get emotional in regards to the subject - after all, I spent time in the Burns Institute, and I wouldn't be alive if it weren't for Shriner's. If you have any issues with this, please feel free to reply, pm, or email me to discuss it further.
Ric, I tend not to speak for others but on this occassion I would be hard pressed to believe that anyone would think ill of the application of the current donations. All of us on the boards here have seen the 'magic' that we can do during significant emotional events in the world as well as providing funds to conduct cure research for fatal diseases.
I started this bad boy up and not one of the donators have mentioned anything in regards to their concerns as to where or how their generous donations were to be used.
I tend to get emotional in regards to charities that are supported on this great message board as well and sometimes it askews my vision as well, so I totally understand where you are coming from. But things are all good, my friend. I myself would LOVE to be there during this time when the 'goodies' are handed out to Shriner's, seeing smiles and bright eyes as well. I feel confident that any requests for photos are just to experience this moment as well... us living vicariously through any pics you could provide. Personally, I have ran this scenario through in my mind... and get choked up at the events to come. It is a great time of the year and while for some it will surely be a 'bad time of the year' for some, we know that we have helped out in some small way to try and make it 'not so bad' or to have someone escape, if only for a few moments from their current situation.
I started this bad boy up and not one of the donators have mentioned anything in regards to their concerns as to where or how their generous donations were to be used.
I tend to get emotional in regards to charities that are supported on this great message board as well and sometimes it askews my vision as well, so I totally understand where you are coming from. But things are all good, my friend. I myself would LOVE to be there during this time when the 'goodies' are handed out to Shriner's, seeing smiles and bright eyes as well. I feel confident that any requests for photos are just to experience this moment as well... us living vicariously through any pics you could provide. Personally, I have ran this scenario through in my mind... and get choked up at the events to come. It is a great time of the year and while for some it will surely be a 'bad time of the year' for some, we know that we have helped out in some small way to try and make it 'not so bad' or to have someone escape, if only for a few moments from their current situation.
- Byrneout
- ...and in THIS corner...
- Posts: 2706
- Joined: Fri Apr 02, 2004 12:26:40 pm
- Location: Originally Hell's Kitchen, NY - *SKREE* that "Clinton, NY" *SKREE* - now Cincinnati, OH
No worries, Chris. I honestly wouldn't at all be upset if someone did ask... I mean, most of you have never met me in person, so you have no gauge by which to determine a trust in me. Understandable. That's why I started working with several contacts at Shriner's a long time ago, so that I would be able to have everything I do validated by Shriner's directly.
The part that got me emotional was the bit about US being mature enough to view pictures of the patients. No offense meant (seriously, I wasn't trying to bust your chops, ibreakhorses ), I just wanted people to understand the perspective and reasoning behind the strict guidelines that the hospital has in regards to pictures of their patients.
So, again, just pat me on the head and let me nod off if I get too charged up. Know that I appreciate EVERYONE'S efforts on this - it does mean more to me than you know.
The part that got me emotional was the bit about US being mature enough to view pictures of the patients. No offense meant (seriously, I wasn't trying to bust your chops, ibreakhorses ), I just wanted people to understand the perspective and reasoning behind the strict guidelines that the hospital has in regards to pictures of their patients.
So, again, just pat me on the head and let me nod off if I get too charged up. Know that I appreciate EVERYONE'S efforts on this - it does mean more to me than you know.
- John Taddeo
- Ninjak and Ninjil went up a hill
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I think sending him to the teller with the "little nugget" that I wrote in the memo section on the check changed the tax classification from "Charity" to "Pleasure Expense"Knightt wrote:
Oh yeah... Ric is going to front the money until the $$$ starts to arrive at his location. Seeing as how it is Christmas time, I plan on making sure he does not have to front that much for too long.
You have all done a great thing, men. Giving when there is a need... you are all superheroes in my book.
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