PLAYING GOD Chapter 7

Playing God - a Valiant story written, drawn, edited, and published online for ValiantFans.com in 2008-2009.

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Fanboy375
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Post by Fanboy375 »

Zaphod wrote:
X-O HoboJoe wrote:
Zaphod wrote:ummmmm, I love the story....but I think there is a bit of an error to this chapter, though hopefully corrected in the graphic novel release.

:thumb:
Oy! Spill it so we know what to fix. :hope:

BTW -- dig the new name, Mr. Beeblebrox. :thumb:
heh, thanks. I go by Zaphod most other message boards I freqquent. I still don't know why I didn't initially sign up that way here.

I figured that out because I got a nasty virus Thursday night, spent most of Friday reinstalling stuff and then another 10 minutes at Vfans.com messageboards, cursing because I couldn't recall my password.

Then I remembered I used a different username here.

Well correct me if I am wrong, and I was hesitant to say it but it seems like the art (sorry) for the character in panels 4,5,6 on page 32 is Peter is all stubbly, but has longer hair. but throughout the rest of the chapter Peter is clean shaven?

maybe I am just confused, which I put much stock in seeing as 3:50am came real quick this morning
:oops:
Those are two (2) different characters. One is Sting and one is the Harbinger (I don't know if i can say the characters name yet) that Clay was recruiting in chapter 4.
Last edited by Fanboy375 on Mon Oct 06, 2008 9:34:48 am, edited 1 time in total.

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Brother J
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Post by Brother J »

Zaphod wrote:
Well correct me if I am wrong, and I was hesitant to say it but it seems like the art (sorry) for the character in panels 4,5,6 on page 32 is Peter is all stubbly, but has longer hair. but throughout the rest of the chapter Peter is clean shaven?

maybe I am just confused, which I put much stock in seeing as 3:50am came real quick this morning
:oops:
The clean shaven character is the Otherman's human form. The stubbly character is Pete. Two different characters that happen to look quite a bit alike.

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Zaphod
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Post by Zaphod »

Brother J wrote:
Zaphod wrote:
Well correct me if I am wrong, and I was hesitant to say it but it seems like the art (sorry) for the character in panels 4,5,6 on page 32 is Peter is all stubbly, but has longer hair. but throughout the rest of the chapter Peter is clean shaven?

maybe I am just confused, which I put much stock in seeing as 3:50am came real quick this morning
:oops:
The clean shaven character is the Otherman's human form. The stubbly character is Pete. Two different characters that happen to look quite a bit alike.
got it now. I guess Otherman doing his houdini trip, coupled with it being early is the only excuse I can claim. Heh. Definately enjoying the trip.
What we need is innovation and even revolution—but not so much in the form of marketing ploys and doohickeys. What is needed is bold creative vision, excellent stories, and brilliant storytelling, in a word, entertainment. -- Jim Shooter

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X-O HoboJoe
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Post by X-O HoboJoe »

Zaphod wrote:
Brother J wrote:
Zaphod wrote:
Well correct me if I am wrong, and I was hesitant to say it but it seems like the art (sorry) for the character in panels 4,5,6 on page 32 is Peter is all stubbly, but has longer hair. but throughout the rest of the chapter Peter is clean shaven?

maybe I am just confused, which I put much stock in seeing as 3:50am came real quick this morning
:oops:
The clean shaven character is the Otherman's human form. The stubbly character is Pete. Two different characters that happen to look quite a bit alike.
got it now. I guess Otherman doing his houdini trip, coupled with it being early is the only excuse I can claim. Heh. Definately enjoying the trip.
The Otherman/Pete thing's totally my bad -- It's been unclear as to who's who and I should have found a better way to distinguish the two . . . :oops:
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UnknownTales
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Post by UnknownTales »

This issue suffers from awkward dialog and repeating panels. Try new visual angles.

Keep working at it. I am enjoying the story.

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X-O HoboJoe
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Post by X-O HoboJoe »

UnknownTales wrote:This issue suffers from awkward dialog and repeating panels. Try new visual angles.

Keep working at it. I am enjoying the story.
Working on the angles aspect . . . It's hard for me to not turn everything into a Kirby rip. :oops:

As far as repeating panels, can you be more specific? :?
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xodacia81
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Post by xodacia81 »

X-O HoboJoe wrote:
UnknownTales wrote:This issue suffers from awkward dialog and repeating panels. Try new visual angles.

Keep working at it. I am enjoying the story.
Working on the angles aspect . . . It's hard for me to not turn everything into a Kirby rip. :oops:

As far as repeating panels, can you be more specific? :?
For me, it seems sometimes that the same panel-almost-is used, with slight variations. It also seems that there are either a lot of big panels or many smaller panels. I think "mixing it up a bit" might help things. I've enjoyed the story and the art, but the design, while solid, has become a tad formulaic. I post in peace and to encourage you guys to keep up the great work AND to improve, because there's always room for more and I know you guys have it in you. :thumb:

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X-O HoboJoe
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Post by X-O HoboJoe »

xodacia81 wrote:
X-O HoboJoe wrote:
UnknownTales wrote:This issue suffers from awkward dialog and repeating panels. Try new visual angles.

Keep working at it. I am enjoying the story.
Working on the angles aspect . . . It's hard for me to not turn everything into a Kirby rip. :oops:

As far as repeating panels, can you be more specific? :?
For me, it seems sometimes that the same panel-almost-is used, with slight variations. It also seems that there are either a lot of big panels or many smaller panels. I think "mixing it up a bit" might help things. I've enjoyed the story and the art, but the design, while solid, has become a tad formulaic. I post in peace and to encourage you guys to keep up the great work AND to improve, because there's always room for more and I know you guys have it in you. :thumb:
Improvement is my goal, so I'm ready to listen to any and all critiques I can get. :thumb:

For ref: When I used the repetition of Sandria in the three middle panels on the last page I was going for an intense, quick passage of time. Sad thing is I spent more time trying to Photoshop those panels than if I just drew them. :!: :(
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dave
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Post by dave »

ah modern technology at its best!

reminds me of tthe test i made for my students last year-i tried to purposely insert errors that the students were supposed to correct-but microsoft word kept correcting it for me! :!:

Fanboy375
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Post by Fanboy375 »

There will be a short delay in getting the next chapter posted. Sorry guys but I have had major techincal issues lately.


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