Bragging rights - your best Dead Universe deal of late?

tictuck · Post by **tictuck** » Sun Jan 25, 2009 1:42 pm

I'd throw Justice Machine in with these 2 books also. I haven't read all the Justice Machine books yet (Haven't got a complete run yet

) But I did read the Justice Machine/Elementals Crossover Mini Series which was real good. I'm only missing like 4 of the Elemental's books not including the Sex Specials for a good complete story run. I read the first 10 issues of The Elementals first series about a year ago and recall it being real good(I believe I bought a majority of them from someone on these boards as I recall just don't remember who)

I did read the GN of Hero Alliance by Pied Piper and that was good reading , couldn't put it down

Knightt · Post by **Knightt** » Sun Jan 25, 2009 10:13 pm

Wish me luck !!!

Three Forge issues... just gonna try 'em out. My only dread is that I will think that they are cool and just ADD that to the list as well.

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?Vi ... CA:US:1123

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?Vi ... CA:US:1123

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?Vi ... CA:US:1123

Elveen · Post by **Elveen** » Sun Jan 25, 2009 10:18 pm

Knightt wrote:Wish me luck !!!

Three Forge issues... just gonna try 'em out. My only dread is that I will think that they are cool and just ADD that to the list as well.

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?Vi ... CA:US:1123

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?Vi ... CA:US:1123

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?Vi ... CA:US:1123

I would be surprised if no one bid on the Sojourn TPB. I was looking for them a while back (I was having a hard time finding the single issues) and these Sojourn TPBs were always going for $10-$15 easy.

But hopefully you will get this one. Good luck Bro.

Draco · Post by **Draco** » Mon Jan 26, 2009 1:44 am

tictuck wrote:I'd throw Justice Machine in with these 2 books also. I haven't read all the Justice Machine books yet (Haven't got a complete run yet ) But I did read the Justice Machine/Elementals Crossover Mini Series which was real good. I'm only missing like 4 of the Elemental's books not including the Sex Specials for a good complete story run. I read the first 10 issues of The Elementals first series about a year ago and recall it being real good(I believe I bought a majority of them from someone on these boards as I recall just don't remember who) I did read the GN of Hero Alliance by Pied Piper and that was good reading , couldn't put it down

I have almost every JM issues apart from the Texas published Annual which contains the first Elementals app.
I used to see that for £10 mid 80's and could never bite. never see it here in UK.

Love all the books from Comico that wewre out at that time.

Brother J · Post by **Brother J** » Mon Jan 26, 2009 9:25 am

Draco wrote:
I have almost every JM issues apart from the Texas published Annual which contains the first Elementals app.
I used to see that for £10 mid 80's and could never bite. never see it here in UK.

Love all the books from Comico that wewre out at that time.

You've got a copy of the Texas Comics Justice Machine Annual now, it will be included with the next bunch of books I send out to you.

Knightt · Post by **Knightt** » Mon Jan 26, 2009 11:08 am

CRAP, I was at work and did not monitor the TPBs... and ended up losing the Sojourn TPB. I had made an initial low bid to keep it fixed on my radar and usually sit there and snipe anyone who tries to get in on the action. But shoot, I wasnt even in my hidespot for this one. BUT I won the other two (which I was ho-hum about) cheap and an Arcanum TPB. All for $3.00 total plus s/h.

Also looking at this:

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?Vi ... %26otn%3D4

And hope to wrap it up with this auction. I'm pretty happy with the auctions won but dang-it, sure would have been nice to get that Sojourn TPB. I have a feeling that the TPBs will be a pricy part of that collection.

It IS good to see that there is a demand out there for the Crossgen books. I think that the quality of the books still to this day command a certain amount of respect. When I think of Crossgen, I think 'quality' and again lament the fact that this line of comics tanked the way it did. I mean I think that they had it going on back in the day... coulda been great but the mighty dollar claimed another victim.

Elveen wrote:
Knightt wrote:Wish me luck !!!

Three Forge issues... just gonna try 'em out. My only dread is that I will think that they are cool and just ADD that to the list as well.

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?Vi ... CA:US:1123

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?Vi ... CA:US:1123

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?Vi ... CA:US:1123
I would be surprised if no one bid on the Sojourn TPB. I was looking for them a while back (I was having a hard time finding the single issues) and these Sojourn TPBs were always going for $10-$15 easy.

But hopefully you will get this one. Good luck Bro.

Draco · Post by **Draco** » Mon Jan 26, 2009 11:55 am

Brother J wrote:
Draco wrote:
I have almost every JM issues apart from the Texas published Annual which contains the first Elementals app.
I used to see that for £10 mid 80's and could never bite. never see it here in UK.

Love all the books from Comico that wewre out at that time.

You've got a copy of the Texas Comics Justice Machine Annual now, it will be included with the next bunch of books I send out to you.

Dude, that is the single coolest thing i can remember happening in some time.

20+ years wanting this book and im speechless !!!!!!!!!

Brother J · Post by **Brother J** » Mon Jan 26, 2009 1:58 pm

Draco wrote:
Brother J wrote:
Draco wrote:
I have almost every JM issues apart from the Texas published Annual which contains the first Elementals app.
I used to see that for £10 mid 80's and could never bite. never see it here in UK.

Love all the books from Comico that wewre out at that time.

You've got a copy of the Texas Comics Justice Machine Annual now, it will be included with the next bunch of books I send out to you.

Dude, that is the single coolest thing i can remember happening in some time.

20+ years wanting this book and im speechless !!!!!!!!!

tictuck · Post by **tictuck** » Wed Jan 28, 2009 8:30 pm

My recent E-Bay purchases

You guys can blame yourselves for getting me jonesing on these titles

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?Vi ... 0322229841

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?Vi ... 0322228580

Don't know what you need on either one of these titles Knightt but I know I don't need all of these lots(Although I need a majority of the Justice Machines) and you are more than welcome to what I don't need

Doorman · Post by **Doorman** » Wed Jan 28, 2009 10:16 pm

Dude

the Justice Machine have a very long publishing history.

After the second and third series (Comico), two more series were published by Innovation. The fifth series was published by Millennium.

I believe the very first series was published by Noble.

Chiclo · Post by **Chiclo** » Thu Jan 29, 2009 10:41 am

Doorman wrote:Dude

the Justice Machine have a very long publishing history.

After the second and third series (Comico), two more series were published by Innovation. The fifth series was published by Millennium.

I believe the very first series was published by Noble.

Texas Comics.

Say it with pride.

(Citation: JayJay interview episode of Only the Valiant)

Brother J · Post by **Brother J** » Thu Jan 29, 2009 11:47 am

Chiclo wrote:
Doorman wrote:Dude

the Justice Machine have a very long publishing history.

After the second and third series (Comico), two more series were published by Innovation. The fifth series was published by Millennium.

I believe the very first series was published by Noble.
Texas Comics.

Say it with pride.

(Citation: JayJay interview episode of Only the Valiant)

No wonder none of us fans knew JayJay was involved with Texas Comics, her name is nowhere to be found in the Justice Machine Annual.

Justice Machine is an interesting creator-owned property in that creator Mike Gustovich didn't write many of the stories about the characters (other than the first issues published by Noble), he would license the characters out to whatever company wanted to publish them and other writers would generally work on the book, sometimes with Gustovich doing the art, sometimes not. Apparently Gustovich doesn't even own the characters anymore (according to wikipedia), that site mentions Mark Ellis purchased the rights from Gustovich in 1991

Doorman · Post by **Doorman** » Thu Jan 29, 2009 3:35 pm

Chiclo wrote:Texas Comics.

Say it with pride.

Texas Comics only published the JM Annual. Prior to that, Noble Comics published five or so issues. And they're oddly-sized issues, at that! (if memory serves correctly, I think they're taller than most comics)

Knightt · Post by **Knightt** » Thu Jan 29, 2009 6:32 pm

Brother J wrote:[No wonder none of us fans knew JayJay was involved with Texas Comics, her name is nowhere to be found in the Justice Machine Annual.

It would make sense. I remember JayJay telling me that she was from Texas.

Knightt · Post by **Knightt** » Thu Jan 29, 2009 6:34 pm

tictuck wrote:Don't know what you need on either one of these titles Knightt but I know I don't need all of these lots(Although I need a majority of the Justice Machines) and you are more than welcome to what I don't need

I don't know just 'what' I need...

I have multiple copies of Millenium Justice Machine #1 and #2 if anybody needs them. I got this huge Millenium lot a while back, loads of stuff.

Knightt · Post by **Knightt** » Thu Jan 29, 2009 6:46 pm

Doorman wrote:
Chiclo wrote:Texas Comics.

Say it with pride.
Texas Comics only published the JM Annual. Prior to that, Noble Comics published five or so issues. And they're oddly-sized issues, at that! (if memory serves correctly, I think they're taller than most comics)

One of their issues (I cant remember which) had two sizes as well of the same comic.

I am surprise and glad that there is talk now of Justice Machine... I have been picking up Justice Machine and Hero Alliance for a couple of years now. JM looks like a fantastic read and seem to go waaaaay back by some of the books that I have.

Here is my most favorite Hero Alliance goodie:

Pied Piper TPB w/ Hard Cover to Hero Alliance (I think by Innovation, gotta check):

And yes, that TPB is as large as a magazine.

Inside HC signed/numbered Hero Alliance (limited):

Guess I'll dig out my Elementals, Justice Machine and Hero Alliance.

I could use a good list of all three titles, so I can tell what I do and do not have. Anyone have (or can put together) a list of all three titles ?

I just back from the VA hospital yesterday, had to take today off and am really just out of it.

J-Scott-R · Post by **J-Scott-R** » Thu Jan 29, 2009 9:19 pm

J-Scott-R wrote:
Knightt wrote:
J-Scott-R wrote:I picked up a nice lot of books today:

Airboy #1,2,3,4,6,7,8,9,10
Armed and Dangerous #1,2,3,4
Babes of Broadway #1
El Cazador #4,6, Bloody Ballad of Blackjack Tom #1
Elementals(1st) #2,3,4,5,6,7,8,9,10,12
(2nd) #11,12,13,14
(3rd) #3, Ghost of A Chance GN
Rogue Trooper #1,2,3,4
Ultraforce(1st) #2,3,4,5,6,
(2nd) #1,3
Ultraforce/Avengers #1
Avengers/Ultraforce #1

all for about $.30 each.

Scott
VERY NICE SCORE and at a great price.

Hopefully soon, I will be getting the comics that I am needing to be at (well just about) 100% on my Airboy run.

Let me know how you like that Rogue Trooper... it is by far, my favorite !

Will do, I'm gonna try Elementals first, then either Airboy or Rogue Trooper.

Just finished my Elementals and Airboy books, thanks guys now I've got two more books to shell out my money on

, but seriously, I love both these books. Willingham's art isn't quite up to par with his writing but the stories are great, and Airboy was great story and artwise. Well off to Rogue Trooper.

Scott

Doorman · Post by **Doorman** » Fri Jan 30, 2009 4:28 pm

Knightt ... you've got the coolest books!

I never even knew that Hero Alliance book existed and I've had a TON of Hero Alliance books ...

tictuck · Post by **tictuck** » Fri Jan 30, 2009 4:51 pm

Yeah that Hardcover Hero Alliance is sweet(Knightt has posted that picture before ) and I have a copy of that over sized softcover one, great stuff. Keep posting those pictures Knightt there are bound to be some new converts out there

Chiclo · Post by **Chiclo** » Fri Jan 30, 2009 5:18 pm

Knightt wrote:
Brother J wrote:[No wonder none of us fans knew JayJay was involved with Texas Comics, her name is nowhere to be found in the Justice Machine Annual.
It would make sense. I remember JayJay telling me that she was from Texas.

She was saying Bernie, down around San Anton'.

SnotDrip · Post by **SnotDrip** » Fri Jan 30, 2009 8:03 pm

Ms Mystic (pacific) #1 (NM+) , Captain Canuck (Comely) 6 and 8 (vfnm and fn) for a whopping total of 0.60 cents.

As well as Starslayer, some valiant junk (about 30 or so) and not applicable but in the same purchase a dozen DC Newstand variants (US and Canadian) for 0.20 each.

Knightt · Post by **Knightt** » Sat Jan 31, 2009 10:32 am

Not a bad pick up Snot-Drip, especially those Captain Canuck... I have find those incredibly hard to come by. With my natural mother being Canadian I feel compelled to find them and someday put them into my comic collection. But that thought is kind of marred by the fact that as an infant I was left by my birth mother at a roadside diner in Winisk, Ontario in the middle of a snow storm with the most tender and loving thing she has has ever written or said about me. The note read: 'Someone please take care of my 'child', I am simply not able to care for this abomination of nature. I would let it suckle from my bosom but it's visage is horrible to behold and it's smell reminds me of a dead moose carcase in a lake during a rather hot summer.'

So yeah, I would like to put together a complete collection of Captain Canuck, just for that sake of memories that would never happen because on that ill-fated (or was it ?) night, the people at the diner took me deep into the woods and threw me into the snow hoping the harsh winter conditions would kill me. My wailings attracted several nearby Sasquatch who thought I was a wounded animal. I was eventually raised by this wonderful yet incredibly savage and brutal Sasquatch clan of nomads ( who's only means of survival was 1) never being detected by humans 2) eating wild berries and dead animals and 3) in a last ditch effort to survive... eating the weakest member of the clan. I would have perished had it not been for my 'clan mother' who suckled me from her hairy yet massive breasts until the age of 17 (this is probably why I am a tit man to this day, not hairy of course, but a little bit of Samantha Fox like peach fuzz is very appealing to me). At one point during an especially harsh winter, the alpha male of the group was bound and determined that I was to be eaten 'for the good of the clan' but when he came to grab me and violently smash my hairless body against the harsh rocks of a nearby river bed, my 'clan mother' got so scared that she accidentally shat upon my naked belly and made my flesh repulsive to all nearby. My 'clan mother' had an irritable bowel syndrome and was constantly defecating, especially when frightened or during periods of sexual arousal. My clan name was 'Mananek Elkoul-Saluk which is a rough translation of 'He who stands with a fist with a hairless body that smells of doo-doo', thus my life was spared but unfortunately, I was accidentally left behind that night as I was forced to sleep away from the warm huddled mass of my clan. I wandered South-West for what seemed like ages until I crossed Lake Huron from Pike Bay Canada and washed up on the shores of Oscoda, Michigan. Then trekking for many days I ended up in Flint, Michigan where I attended the Burton School for Savage-like Lifeforms until the days of my adulthood.

While walking the streets of Mt. Morris, I was drawn to a U.S. Army recruiting station. The day I got there it was a four day weekend so I spent those four days huddled against the door until I was found by the Army recruiters the following Monday morning while I was dry humping a nearby mailbox. They were just one shy of meeting their monthly quota so I was cleaned up, shaved and bought new clothes by a wonderful Soldier named Master Sergeant Ricky Tomasic. He taught me standard Army English communication skills and commands, how to assemble and dis-assemble an M-16 rifle and how to march. I was enlisted in the Infantry with an enlistment bonus where I kept $614 US Dollars (MSG Tomasic keeping the remaining $20,000 for 'safekeeping' which he unfortunately squandered on his addiction to 'midget amputee porn sites') and the Airborne School option. My first assignment was Fort Bragg, NC and upon arrival I was sent directly to El Salvador where I excelled at the art of hand to hand combat and was promoted up the ranks rather quickly. My only setback was constantly wanting to wade into combat completely in the nude. With only my M-16, bayonet and a Snickers™ bar between my @sscheeks I fought like an animal. (I believe that I was then drawn to Snickers™ bars after learning that the Snickers™ was a chocolate bar made by the Mars family. It consists of peanut butter nougat topped with roasted peanuts and caramel, covered with milk chocolate. I was impressed that Snickers™ is the best selling chocolate bar of all time and has annual global sales of US $2 billion). I found this Snickers™ bar very pleasing to my palette and a very nice fit between my buttocks that never fell out or hindered my ability to effectively fight hand to hand during battle. This not only unsettled the El Salvadorian insurgents but my fellow Soldiers as well. I was then sent to SFAS which stands for Special Forces Assessment and Selection. Barely passing the course (due to me constantly feeling constrained by clothing and being denied Snickers™ bars), I was then sent to the Q-Course (Qualification Course) where I excelled at the Assembly and disassembly of all weapons made by the U.S., Middle-East, Chinese and Soviet Block countries, ensuring my Military Occupational Skill as an 18B Special Force Weapons NCO... and now I here I sit at my computer (buck naked) telling you my story and why I have this deep down feeling of collecting Captain Canuck comics.

Snotdrip, if you ever get back to that store and they have any remaining Captain Canuck comics, please pick them up for me and I will reimburse you immediately along with shipping and handling via Paypal.

A bit of sad news, I was notified about two months ago that my 'clan mother' lost her life while trying to relieve herself among a range of Cliffs in Elora, Ontario. She apparently farted loudly which startled her and led to her loosing her footing. She then fell to her death in the frigid waters and rocks below. Her body was never recovered but a small patch of deerskin with a crude drawing of a small child was later found 21 miles down the river. I would like to believe that the drawing was of me. I think my Sasquatch 'clan mother' never forgot me and lamented my absence until the day she died. Now this patch of deerskin was covered in fecal material which leads me to believe that she had used it to wipe her behind after dropping a deuce but the presence of the deerskin makes me a bit melancholy even after all these years. It seems like just yesterday that I was frolicking with my Sasquatch brothers and sisters in the woods or Northern Ontario where they would pull at my scrotum and playfully tease me for my lack of body hair by beating me with sticks fashioned into clubs. Good times... but as with everything in life, we move on, grow from our experiences and tend to forget the small things in life which bring us joy...

So, again Snot-Drip (or anyone for that matter), if you happen to have any extra Captain Canuck comics, I would like to buy them from you or perhaps trade

tictuck · Post by **tictuck** » Sat Jan 31, 2009 10:46 am

Knightt wrote:Not a bad pick up Snot-Drip, especially those Captain Canuck... I have find those incredibly hard to come by. With my natural mother being Canadian I feel compelled to find them and someday put them into my comic collection. But that thought is kind of marred by the fact that as an infant I was left by my birth mother at a roadside diner in Winisk, Ontario in the middle of a snow storm with the most tender and loving thing she has has ever written or said about me. The note read: 'Someone please take care of my 'child', I am simply not able to care for this abomination of nature. I would let it suckle from my bosom but it's visage is horrible to behold and it's smell reminds me of a dead moose carcase in a lake during a rather hot summer.'

So yeah, I would like to put together a complete collection of Captain Canuck, just for that sake of memories that would never happen because on that ill-fated (or was it ?) night, the people at the diner took me deep into the woods and threw me into the snow hoping the harsh winter conditions would kill me. My wailings attracted several nearby Sasquatch who thought I was a wounded animal. I was eventually raised by this wonderful yet incredibly savage and brutal Sasquatch clan of nomads ( who's only means of survival was 1) never being detected by humans 2) eating wild berries and dead animals and 3) in a last ditch effort to survive... eating the weakest member of the clan. I would have perished had it not been for my 'clan mother' who suckled me from her hairy yet massive breasts until the age of 17 (this is probably why I am a tit man to this day, not hairy of course, but a little bit of Samantha Fox like peach fuzz is very appealing to me). At one point during an especially harsh winter, the alpha male of the group was bound and determined that I was to be eaten 'for the good of the clan' but when he came to grab me and violently smash my hairless body against the harsh rocks of a nearby river bed, my 'clan mother' got so scared that she accidentally shat upon my naked belly and made my flesh repulsive to all nearby. My 'clan mother' had an irritable bowel syndrome and was constantly defecating, especially when frightened or during periods of sexual arousal. My clan name was 'Mananek Elkoul-Saluk which is a rough translation of 'He who stands with a fist with a hairless body that smells of doo-doo', thus my life was spared but unfortunately, I was accidentally left behind that night as I was forced to sleep away from the warm huddled mass of my clan. I wandered South-West for what seemed like ages until I crossed Lake Huron from Pike Bay Canada and washed up on the shores of Oscoda, Michigan. Then trekking for many days I ended up in Flint, Michigan where I attended the Burton School for Savage-like Lifeforms until the days of my adulthood.

While walking the streets of Mt. Morris, I was drawn to a U.S. Army recruiting station. The day I got there it was a four day weekend so I spent those four days huddled against the door until I was found by the Army recruiters the following Monday morning while I was dry humping a nearby mailbox. They were just one shy of meeting their monthly quota so I was cleaned up, shaved and bought new clothes by a wonderful Soldier named Master Sergeant Ricky Tomasic. He taught me standard Army English communication skills and commands, how to assemble and dis-assemble an M-16 rifle and how to march. I was enlisted in the Infantry with an enlistment bonus where I kept $614 US Dollars (MSG Tomasic keeping the remaining $20,000 for 'safekeeping' which he unfortunately squandered on his addiction to 'midget amputee porn sites') and the Airborne School option. My first assignment was Fort Bragg, NC and upon arrival I was sent directly to El Salvador where I excelled at the art of hand to hand combat and was promoted up the ranks rather quickly. My only setback was constantly wanting to wade into combat completely in the nude. With only my M-16, bayonet and a Snickers™ bar between my @sscheeks I fought like an animal. (I believe that I was then drawn to Snickers™ bars after learning that the Snickers™ was a chocolate bar made by the Mars family. It consists of peanut butter nougat topped with roasted peanuts and caramel, covered with milk chocolate. I was impressed that Snickers™ is the best selling chocolate bar of all time and has annual global sales of US $2 billion). I found this Snickers™ bar very pleasing to my palette and a very nice fit between my buttocks that never fell out or hindered my ability to effectively fight hand to hand during battle. This not only unsettled the El Salvadorian insurgents but my fellow Soldiers as well. I was then sent to SFAS which stands for Special Forces Assessment and Selection. Barely passing the course (due to me constantly feeling constrained by clothing and being denied Snickers™ bars), I was then sent to the Q-Course (Qualification Course) where I excelled at the Assembly and disassembly of all weapons made by the U.S., Middle-East, Chinese and Soviet Block countries, ensuring my Military Occupational Skill as an 18B Special Force Weapons NCO... and now I here I sit at my computer (buck naked) telling you my story and why I have this deep down feeling of collecting Captain Canuck comics.

Snotdrip, if you ever get back to that store and they have any remaining Captain Canuck comics, please pick them up for me and I will reimburse you immediately along with shipping and handling via Paypal.

A bit of sad news, I was notified about two months ago that my 'clan mother' lost her life while trying to relieve herself among a range of Cliffs in Elora, Ontario. She apparently farted loudly which startled her and led to her loosing her footing. She then fell to her death in the frigid waters and rocks below. Her body was never recovered but a small patch of deerskin with a crude drawing of a small child was later found 21 miles down the river. I would like to believe that the drawing was of me. I think my Sasquatch 'clan mother' never forgot me and lamented my absence until the day she died. Now this patch of deerskin was covered in fecal material which leads me to believe that she had used it to wipe her behind after dropping a deuce but the presence of the deerskin makes me a bit melancholy even after all these years. It seems like just yesterday that I was frolicking with my Sasquatch brothers and sisters in the woods or Northern Ontario where they would pull at my scrotum and playfully tease me for my lack of body hair by beating me with sticks fashioned into clubs. Good times... but as with everything in life, we move on, grow from our experiences and tend to forget the small things in life which bring us joy...

So, again Snot-Drip (or anyone for that matter), if you happen to have any extra Captain Canuck comics, I would like to buy them from you or perhaps trade

Loved the story Knight, it made me cry , it made me laugh and it made me fart but mostly laugh

If he has any he most likely won't charge you paypal or shipping fees as I was informed by a board member in a PM that I'm the only one who does this on these boards and no it wasn't you Knightt or Snot-Drip who said this. God I've got to just drop this and quit focusing on negatives so much, Serenity Now, Serenity Now.

P.S . Knightt may know who I'm refering to

JohnnyRnR · Post by **JohnnyRnR** » Sat Jan 31, 2009 2:24 pm

Knightt wrote:Not a bad pick up Snot-Drip, especially those Captain Canuck... I have find those incredibly hard to come by. With my natural mother being Canadian I feel compelled to find them and someday put them into my comic collection. But that thought is kind of marred by the fact that as an infant I was left by my birth mother at a roadside diner in Winisk, Ontario in the middle of a snow storm with the most tender and loving thing she has has ever written or said about me. The note read: 'Someone please take care of my 'child', I am simply not able to care for this abomination of nature. I would let it suckle from my bosom but it's visage is horrible to behold and it's smell reminds me of a dead moose carcase in a lake during a rather hot summer.'

So yeah, I would like to put together a complete collection of Captain Canuck, just for that sake of memories that would never happen because on that ill-fated (or was it ?) night, the people at the diner took me deep into the woods and threw me into the snow hoping the harsh winter conditions would kill me. My wailings attracted several nearby Sasquatch who thought I was a wounded animal. I was eventually raised by this wonderful yet incredibly savage and brutal Sasquatch clan of nomads ( who's only means of survival was 1) never being detected by humans 2) eating wild berries and dead animals and 3) in a last ditch effort to survive... eating the weakest member of the clan. I would have perished had it not been for my 'clan mother' who suckled me from her hairy yet massive breasts until the age of 17 (this is probably why I am a tit man to this day, not hairy of course, but a little bit of Samantha Fox like peach fuzz is very appealing to me). At one point during an especially harsh winter, the alpha male of the group was bound and determined that I was to be eaten 'for the good of the clan' but when he came to grab me and violently smash my hairless body against the harsh rocks of a nearby river bed, my 'clan mother' got so scared that she accidentally shat upon my naked belly and made my flesh repulsive to all nearby. My 'clan mother' had an irritable bowel syndrome and was constantly defecating, especially when frightened or during periods of sexual arousal. My clan name was 'Mananek Elkoul-Saluk which is a rough translation of 'He who stands with a fist with a hairless body that smells of doo-doo', thus my life was spared but unfortunately, I was accidentally left behind that night as I was forced to sleep away from the warm huddled mass of my clan. I wandered South-West for what seemed like ages until I crossed Lake Huron from Pike Bay Canada and washed up on the shores of Oscoda, Michigan. Then trekking for many days I ended up in Flint, Michigan where I attended the Burton School for Savage-like Lifeforms until the days of my adulthood.

While walking the streets of Mt. Morris, I was drawn to a U.S. Army recruiting station. The day I got there it was a four day weekend so I spent those four days huddled against the door until I was found by the Army recruiters the following Monday morning while I was dry humping a nearby mailbox. They were just one shy of meeting their monthly quota so I was cleaned up, shaved and bought new clothes by a wonderful Soldier named Master Sergeant Ricky Tomasic. He taught me standard Army English communication skills and commands, how to assemble and dis-assemble an M-16 rifle and how to march. I was enlisted in the Infantry with an enlistment bonus where I kept $614 US Dollars (MSG Tomasic keeping the remaining $20,000 for 'safekeeping' which he unfortunately squandered on his addiction to 'midget amputee porn sites') and the Airborne School option. My first assignment was Fort Bragg, NC and upon arrival I was sent directly to El Salvador where I excelled at the art of hand to hand combat and was promoted up the ranks rather quickly. My only setback was constantly wanting to wade into combat completely in the nude. With only my M-16, bayonet and a Snickers™ bar between my @sscheeks I fought like an animal. (I believe that I was then drawn to Snickers™ bars after learning that the Snickers™ was a chocolate bar made by the Mars family. It consists of peanut butter nougat topped with roasted peanuts and caramel, covered with milk chocolate. I was impressed that Snickers™ is the best selling chocolate bar of all time and has annual global sales of US $2 billion). I found this Snickers™ bar very pleasing to my palette and a very nice fit between my buttocks that never fell out or hindered my ability to effectively fight hand to hand during battle. This not only unsettled the El Salvadorian insurgents but my fellow Soldiers as well. I was then sent to SFAS which stands for Special Forces Assessment and Selection. Barely passing the course (due to me constantly feeling constrained by clothing and being denied Snickers™ bars), I was then sent to the Q-Course (Qualification Course) where I excelled at the Assembly and disassembly of all weapons made by the U.S., Middle-East, Chinese and Soviet Block countries, ensuring my Military Occupational Skill as an 18B Special Force Weapons NCO... and now I here I sit at my computer (buck naked) telling you my story and why I have this deep down feeling of collecting Captain Canuck comics.

Snotdrip, if you ever get back to that store and they have any remaining Captain Canuck comics, please pick them up for me and I will reimburse you immediately along with shipping and handling via Paypal.

A bit of sad news, I was notified about two months ago that my 'clan mother' lost her life while trying to relieve herself among a range of Cliffs in Elora, Ontario. She apparently farted loudly which startled her and led to her loosing her footing. She then fell to her death in the frigid waters and rocks below. Her body was never recovered but a small patch of deerskin with a crude drawing of a small child was later found 21 miles down the river. I would like to believe that the drawing was of me. I think my Sasquatch 'clan mother' never forgot me and lamented my absence until the day she died. Now this patch of deerskin was covered in fecal material which leads me to believe that she had used it to wipe her behind after dropping a deuce but the presence of the deerskin makes me a bit melancholy even after all these years. It seems like just yesterday that I was frolicking with my Sasquatch brothers and sisters in the woods or Northern Ontario where they would pull at my scrotum and playfully tease me for my lack of body hair by beating me with sticks fashioned into clubs. Good times... but as with everything in life, we move on, grow from our experiences and tend to forget the small things in life which bring us joy...

So, again Snot-Drip (or anyone for that matter), if you happen to have any extra Captain Canuck comics, I would like to buy them from you or perhaps trade

You're a wierd dude.

Welcome to the boards!

Doorman · Post by **Doorman** » Sat Jan 31, 2009 6:11 pm

Knightt wrote:So, again Snot-Drip (or anyone for that matter), if you happen to have any extra Captain Canuck comics, I would like to buy them from you or perhaps trade

Yo Knightt!

Guess who's got Captain Canuck comics available ...

That's right ... this guy!